182: Love Happens

Love Happens (PG-13) - 2009 - Runtime: 109 minutes
Starring: Aaron Eckhart, Jennifer Aniston
Director: Brandon Camp

Oh boy. I'm all for these movies, but let's just talk about the title? Okay - meet me down a few lines, I need to take a deep breath to enter into this topic of bad film titles.

So it seems that lately there has been a rash of bad film titles. Like it's gotten so bad that nobody seems to care. I mean this movie? Love Happens? I could think of a ton of different titles that are waaay better! Here: Seattle Love Story. A Parrot Named Rocky and His Totally Available Hunk, Burke. Two People Meet. Vandalism of the Heart. Eh? Okay! (You had to have watched the movie in order to get that last one - but please don't! Just take my word for it that it's extremely funny!) Okay, so we have Love Happens. But what about that rash of -ing movies invading Hollywood. Knowing, Fighting, umm, well that's it but that is two too many! Okay then there's the really long-winded titles: Percy Jackson and the Olympians Battling and Fighting With the Lightning Thief Because He's a Thief, Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian with a Cameo by Amy Adams, Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire Because They Already Made a Movie Called "Push" and Yes, We Think the Public Could Not Discern Between a Movie About Poor Black People and a Movie About White People With Superpowers. C'mon, really? And then there's just plain idiotic ones: Funny People (I know, I know I liked it, but c'mon that title sucked!), Ninja Assassin, Push, Gamer, Shorts. I could go on but I digress. The only good thing about bad titles? It's easy to dismiss them because if they can't take the time to come up with a compelling title, chances are they really didn't do too much with the actual script. But I guess all I'm asking for is some creative juices flowing when it comes to naming your movie, possibly the most important part of the movie! Can you imagine if The Departed was called Bad Cop/Good Cop? Or There Will Be Blood was called Oil Crazy? Seriously, first impressions are vital. And don't get me started on DVD covers, that's a whole bloody series of blog posts.

You're still here? Well, back to the movie itself. As you can tell by the rant and by the title - this movie is pretty much garbage. I don't need to spend too much time on this. Aaron Eckhart, who is quite the handsome man, or so I'm told, plays Burke, a man who lost his wife in a supposedly tragic car accident. And he turned it into a thousand-dollar industry! He wrote a book and inspirational conferences about coping with the loss of a loved one. And he meets somebody (the supposedly down on her luck Jennifer Aniston who just can't seem to find the right man). And apparently love happens, but I don't think the cameras caught it (zing!).

The problem is that there's zero chemistry between the two leads and they seem to amble through their scenes together. Like they forgot they were filming a romance movie. We're supposed to think that Aniston's character (Eloise. Yes, like Eloise at the Plaza - I'm sure that's the inspiration) is quirky and jubilant and that's what makes her so attractive to Burke. But if owning a flower shop and writing odd words behind hotel paintings is quirky, I must be a raging eccentric freak. And despite the movie is under two hours - it felt so long! After only half an hour I was hoping we could get to the end. It was just boring!

So, please don't waste your time. Watch The Notebook for the tenth time.

Rating: Avoid Like the Plague!

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